心からお悔やみ申し上げます

I was introduced to Shozo and Masami Uno last Christmas when I went back. They were a delightful Japanese couple residing in Malaysia due to the husband's work. They were so happy at being invited to our Christmas celebration that they extended invitation for me to join their family dinner that night itself.

I felt bad for not being able to attend that dinner, and for not being able to attend her Japanese dance performance the next day. I had just arrived Malaysia the day before, so was still feeling a bit tired. What a lousy excuse.

So I was really happy that they decided to visit me during the CNY hols. I had the privilege of bringing them around Kobe, and showing them my favourite places. This was the dessert we had together at a la campagne.

We did try to meet up again when they visited Japan during the summer, though our schedules didn't work out in the end. In our last communication, I told her I would definitely meet up with them when I go back home during winter break.

So I was really shocked to get this SMS few hours ago :
今晩は
今日主人が亡くなりました。明日マレーシアでお葬式です。暫くはマレーシアにいますので

I had to read it a few times to make sure I understood it. In the end, I managed to get Yumiko to help me write out a proper condolence message to her, since I was not sure how such messages should be done.

I hope I get to see her when I go back...

don't think it's because of the rust

Last month, the unexpected happen. I knew it wasn't over yet, even though her husband seemed oddly amicable given the circumstances. It was as if a switch within her got triggered and she suddenly remembered the past and started spewing hurtful words.

I really wanted to run away and cry but I had to do the adult thing and put on a brave face as there were still people around. Yumiko who was welcoming visitors tried to distract me by introducing me to them. I tried to act interested but I could only be friendly for awhile.

Later as she was speaking with Naoki, she found out that I had not been introduced. I had known him for some time to be a good worship leader, so I was genuinely interested to speak with him. That conversation led to me trying out for music practice few weeks later and we had a good time going through some songs.

I was not comfortable enough to play for the regular service because of what had happened, so I had to tell him I was going to pray about it a little more.

Last Sunday, Ka'chan asked me if I could stay back a little. They were looking for pianists for the Sunday Chinese morning service, which I had never attended before. I thought why not, maybe a good opportunity to get my fingers busy again, and to brush up my rusty mother tongue. One step at a time, I wonder where this will lead to.

should i look forward?

The previous week, each of us were called to have a meeting with the boss. No agenda was stated, so everyone (except for his "secretary") started wondering what it meant, and some even started speculating.

My slot was scheduled in the middle of lunch, so I decided I might as well grab a quick bite so that if anything happened, I would have enough blood sugar to deal with it.

As suspected, it was an internal reorganisation. I had questions but I didn't voice all of them out. Like how at first glance it seemed a little unfair and didn't quite make sense. I felt a bit comforted later that my colleague said he was surprised I was not promoted.

Come 2015, I would be reporting to a different manager, a Japanese. I would be in a completely new team, almost all who are Japanese. I have been assured by my boss that my current assignment would remain the same, and my way of working would not change, except that I have a new reporting line.

Oh well, if this is all in His plans, I gotta trust that He is still in control, and that He has His reasons. Trying to look at it positively, though still can't shake off the thought that it still doesn't quite make sense.

still home

Only a few more weeks...

I usually don't announce my going back, but it feels like it's been a long year this 2014. I have made a list of what I want to eat when I get home. It's a working list of course, and I'm surprised that there are still many things I left out the last trip. I'd better stop typing, my stomach is gonna make some noise just imagining all the yummy food it's gonna have soon!

colouring my autumn

Where did November go? It felt like the chilly winds just came and swept the 11th month away. Before I knew it, the golds had turned to reds and browns, and not long after, they all came falling down.

Autumn sure was short. I guess it's true what they say; some of the best moments in life are brief. I was a little sad that I didn't get to do much autumn leaf viewing as in previous years. These few months were hectic at work; and will continue to be so into at least Q1 next year.

On the bright side, I did have some time to experiment in the kitchen. I tried making this for Ako-san's birthday, though would have loved to share it with more people. I made 2 versions - one for individual treats, and a bigger one for the group.

I call it my summer jelly cause it's just full of summer colours. I had a bit of fun with the coconut milk and had them guessing the secret ingredient!

Also had some time to host a friend from Tokyo who was here for the Kobe Marathon. I can't believe it's now entering my 3rd year being in Kobe with the marathon starting line just around the corner where I live. What a pity I'm not that into running!

Still, this bouquet made for some cheer despite the colds. Am thankful for little blessings such as these.