granpapa's day

I thought I should write this while it's still fresh. Besides, I owe some people explanation as to why I did not pick up their calls or reply their messages. Yes, even at this time of mourning I'm sensible enough to settle stuff for the next few days.

I can't believe I cried so much. It wasn't as if I was really close to my granpa. He was the strong silent patriarch of the family, and never really said much. Even when I was very young, about 3, when my mum went to Holland to accompany my father on a course, I was left with my maternal grandparents. My younger brother was sent to live with granpa and granma Lee.

I guess, I regretted not spending as much time as I should with him. The last time I met up with them was during CNY. I kept scolding myself that he didn't receive salvation. I don't know if it's my fault for not being there. But my parents have been diligently sharing the good news with him for many years. And of all days, it had to happen on Father's Day...

Well, the one thing that consoled us was that he died peacefully. He wasn't struggling or fighting for his life. He just closed his eyes and breathed his last on his favourite chair.

I just came back from the funeral "service", overwhelmed by the support from the church members. Most of them were from GT's chinese church. In fact, I think they outnumbered the Lee family. It was good to see them meet my relatives. Even some of the church board members came to give their support.

There will be another one tomorrow evening, and we will send him off to be buried on Tues morning. I shall be offline for these few days.

Goodness, I look like a panda. That's my cue to log off and go to bed! It's been a long day and there's still much to do. For those who've messaged me personally, thanks for your prayers. Really appreciate it.

[Update 12 July : My cousin's tribute to our "ah yeh"]